Monday, June 28, 2010

to our langging-pangging


Dear Eve,

When you’re big enough to read this, I’m sure you won’t remember me as that Aunt who visited you when you were still one year old. By then, you’ll probably know me as that crazy Aunt who unceremoniously pops up for dinner without warning, carrying two bottles of wine – one for the rest of the family and another one for herself.

So, yeah, you probably won’t remember me as that Aunt whom, to the surprise of everyone in the house, you consented to be cuddled, and that you fell asleep in her arms the first day you meet.

What a beautiful experience that was, Eve. That day, your Dad and Kuyas fetched me at the airport, which was a good one-hour drive away from your home. I felt both excited and anxious to meet you; excited because this would be our first meeting, and anxious because I had a feeling you won’t like me at all.

You see, your Kuya Brus didn’t like me the first time we met, so I was pretty sure you’d be the same, too. Even your Mom warned me beforehand: when her friends tried to hold you? You had a hissy fit, and would not let them come touch you.

When I arrived, you had just woken up from your nap, and traces of sleep had not yet left your eyes. I remember you stared intently at me for a good second or two, your brows furrowed, as if you were thinking: “Now who is this girl, and what is she doing in my house?”

So imagine all our surprise when, a few minutes later, I ventured approaching you, holding out my arms, and you JUST WILLINGLY GAVE YOURSELF TO ME. Your mom and I were both so shocked we just stared at each other, and I did not dare move, for fear that you might realize what you just did, and then start wailing. Thankfully, you didn’t.

You even fell asleep while you were in my arms.

And even though, minutes later, my arms were literally screaming with pain (because you’re really heavy for a little lady), I sucked it up and held you as long as I could.

I know our time together was not enough (well, it may never be enough), but seeing you with your brothers, I just know you’ll do fine. You’re our only baby girl, and, they may seem to be overprotective of you, but that’s just because they love you. (I know. The men in our family have a funny way of showing their love, sometimes.)

Just the mere sight of you seeming to be in pain, just the mere peep of your cry, or that hiccupy thing you do that tells us you are about to cry, your Dad and Kuyas go and trip over themselves trying to comfort you.

I know I can’t ever hope to be your best friend, Eve, because hello? WE’RE HALF A WORLD AWAY. But know that whenever you need someone to talk to, or someone to convince your brothers to leave you alone – hey, I’m always here. :)

We love you, langging-pangging.

Thursday, September 10, 2009

song of the week: hostage of love


Razorlight is an English indie-rock band, and Hostage of Love is from their 3rd album, Slipway Fires.

Like what some of the reviewers say, I prefer to think Johnny Borrell was personifying love (in all forms) when he wrote this song. It's even got a biblical theme running through some parts.

Listen.



You make yourself a prisoner of me
You blind yourself so you don't have to see
You turn your life to a power above
And make yourself a hostage of love

You turn from me, you turn from the strain
Devote yourself to the power again
Distance yourself from all that we vowed
You broke the rules, you're my hostage now

I am a sinner
I am a saint
I am a devil
I am the ghost at the wake
I feed the swell and pull
Of your tears as they break
I am the limit of
The load you can take

You are the pulley
And I am the winch
I am salvation
And your herald of sin
I take you beyond
Your limits of trust
Redeem yourself
Hostage of love

You say you have been born again
Since you slept there in that liar's den,
You cannot be saved
You gave your innocence away

I've turned my cheek
And I've suffered the blow
The truth of my story
Is widely unknown
Words of derision I have
Swallowed with a smile
For telling my story
I have been crucified

Now like a madman
I give my laurels to you
And like a hero
Forsake my trophies for you
Though a disciple of this devil
That is in our blood
Am I not also
Your hostage of love?

You say you have been born again
Since you slept there in that liar's den,
You cannot return
Until your innocence is earned

You say you've got to live alone
Though it hurts,
You'll make it on your own
You cannot be saved
You gave your innocence away

You will remain a hostage of love

Thursday, September 3, 2009

the great debate


I've been debating with myself lately: should I go curly? Or remain straight? (With my hair, I mean.)


You see, I've always wanted wanted WANTED to have those curls, but the last time I had my hair permed, it was curly for about a week or so.


And then it went back to the frizzy, limp hair I've always had. So I thought I was finally at this stage where I've made peace with my hair and I've accepted it for what it really is = frizzy, boring, dull.


But then I saw that picture above, and I was like


O.M.G. Bring. It. On.


So I'm thinking I may just take another stab at that dream hair I've always wanted, and I may do just that this weekend.


Or maybe not.


The great debate continues, thus.

mission: impossible

Art: Courtesy of Courtney

One drunken episode a few nights back, I decided to disturb someone's peaceful night by sending him philosophical, thought-provoking text messages (let's just say this someone's name is Cocoy).


But honestly? Reviewing these messages, I really don't know what I meant by these, and even he was equally stumped as well. Perhaps y'all could help decipher what I meant?


So in case you're needing a little bit of puzzle-solving fix, consider these:


Text 1 (sent 11:57pm) - !@@


Text 2 (sent 11:57pm) - dhlum nahan a2c


Text 3 (sent 12:02am) - kmi rabif


Text 4 (sent 12:08am) - frme nku


Text 5 (sent 12:08am) - rai ak dha


Text 6 (sent 12:10am) - mka nmtbh nh jndx 4roo h an a ck hm


Text 7 (sent 12:10am) - ,--


Text 8 (sent 12:11am) - gqmpn dw i6 iac


--End


Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to decode these text messages. I suggest you knock back a tequila shot or two (or more - who cares, right?) so that you can maybe try to see where I'm coming from when I sent these.


I'd also wanna add (in true "mission: impossible" style): "this blog post will self-destruct in a few seconds," but that would be stretching it quite a bit.


So I'll just end this post with: "Bottoms up!"


Monday, August 24, 2009

let's bang our heads on the wall, shall we?

Art: Courtesy of Through the Illusion




What would you do when one morning you wake up and you realize you no longer like the person you've become?



What would you think of someone who says one thing to you, and then goes off and says the opposite thing to other people?



What would you do when you know there's so much left unsaid, but you could not find the words?



How would you feel when you're quite certain of an impending doom, and you wait and wait for it to happen every fricking day, but nothing. ever. happens.



How would you politely say, "Don't fuck with me, 'cause I fuck back"?



And most importantly, why is there a Dora the Explorer in my phonebook??

Saturday, July 25, 2009

if i were a girl..


So, lazy blogger that I am, I decided for my next post, I'll let the guys do the talking. I asked them to fill in the blank: If I were a girl, _______.

Here's what I got so far (names are abbreviated to protect the guilty innocent).

From T:







Hmmm...

From H:








Personally, I think kikay means "getting away with almost everything just because you're a girl." But whatever, urbandictionary!

And here's from B:






Ayayay! Somebody sure will be gettin' some lovin' tonight! ;D

From F:







Okay, F, gotta love what you have, huh? :D

From M:








Ooooh...

From E:








Translation: If I were a girl, I'd be prettier than you.
Someone sounds a little too confident! :p

And lastly, from a guy I met waaaay way back (let's just call him A):









Ladies and gentlemen, we have a winner.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

posted in twitter:

To the guy in a white shirt at Fully Booked: Our eyes met for only a moment, but already it felt like a small forever.

 
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